Inner Depth

Hello. I figured I would write out what I want to say for the blog prompt that the campers did today. Basically, I am going to describe what I would look like if a witch's curse turned me into a living portrait or a living piece of artwork.
The image that immediately comes to mind is one of darkness surrounding a fading light. I would be an abstract painting, as nothing about me fills the lines needed to create a solid image. I am complex, yet I look simple. In the center there is a white shimmer of light that seems to shift. A darkness smothers it, almost trapping the light inside. But it doesn't seem like a trap. It's more of a wall that constantly moves and shifts to adapt to whatever is threatening the light. Inside the light, there are little specks of color that seem insignificant yet brighten up the entire piece. The tiny dots of color brighten the darkness and make it seem less terrible.

I'll finish this later, but I know I won't continue unless I publish this. So long for now!

Edit:
See? I told you I wouldn't finish it. So I guess I'll finish it now. I don't really have any more descriptions for what I would look like as a work of art, but I do want to talk about the awesome thing that just happened this morning.

You can read the whole story here, but basically I can get married in any state and they would have to recognize it. I'm so happy!!! This is a huge step for society and I'm glad it occurred before I could fight for it, because God knows I would raise hell for opponents. Not violently, but with my intelligence and debate skills. I can't wait for my wedding day. Of course, my ultimate dream is to be married to my future wife through the Catholic church, but I know that won't happen. Still. A girl can dream. So long for now! 

Updates

Hello, Internet People. So I guess I should fill you in on the details of my life that you missed out on. SO here it is. Since my post from September, things have changed drastically. I am no longer associated with Lesli in any way, for one. I tried to be her friend, but she started dating Elisabeth and still expected me to be her confidant. She went to me for all her problems, even those with Elisabeth, and I had to tell her to back off. I completely cut off contact with her in September when she started flirting with me overtly with Elisabeth in the room. So I stopped talking to her. I wasn't mean enough to not text her assignments when she missed school, but conversation never extended beyond that. We completely stopped interacting in all forms in February when she asked me what was wrong on a particularly bad day for me. I reacted strongly and she couldn't understand why. That was when she finally got the hint that I didn't want to be in her life anymore.
Even though she ended it, it still seemed like she wanted to get back together. Especially from the way she looked at Kat. That was another big change this school year. Kat, or Katrina, became very close to me and I became her best friend. Because of this new-found closeness, I became extremely affectionate with her. This translated into many people, including my brother, assuming we were a couple. So many people thought we were dating, and I'm pretty sure they still do. Sigh. Drama. I hate it.
So.....The biggest change. In March of this year, my mom's cousin passed away. It was the first day of my Rotary month, so there are some bad memories there. I feel extremely guilty about the whole thing. Louie was my favorite of my mom's cousins. He was gay and happy and so funny. Then he got stomach cancer. His health started declining in December, and it just went down hill until he passed on March 5th. It was hard on all of us. My mom's birthday was the following Friday, so that made it all worse. I mentioned earlier that I felt guilty, and now I'll tell you why. I hadn't seen him since we took the trip to LA last summer. I had every opportunity to go see him, especially near the end. Why didn't I go see him? My mom told me about how skinny he was, and how tired he was getting. I didn't want to tarnish my memory of him with who he was becoming near the end. I'm glad I didn't go, as bad as that sounds. The body in that box wasn't my beloved cousin who was more like an uncle to me. It was the body of someone taken too soon. It was the body of someone who wasted away. It wasn't the body of someone who laughed every day. It wasn't the body of someone who joked with my mom. I didn't recognize him. And it made me terribly sad.
Ok. Enough of this. I can't keep thinking about this, especially at the YWiC camp. I guess this is it for the update. So long for now!

We Begin Again!

Hey. So, it's been a while since I last posted anything. Sorry for that. I've been reading my blog and I have to say I was pretty outspoken about my homosexuality. I apologize for that as well. I feel like I've transformed for the better in a span of 6 months. I'd like to think I've grown up, but I'll let you be the judge of that.
So. What to talk about? Well, I'm currently working as a camp assistant for the Young Women in Computing camp at NMSU. It's really fun. This is the second week of the middle school camp. It's been fun. I really like helping with the camp. I may or may not have a crush on one of the other staff members. I won't say who, even though I doubt they will ever find out.
I don't really know what to add to this. It's been nearly 9 months since I last blogged. What do I even talk about? I need to get back into the groove of things. Well. I guess this is it. So long for now!

Monthly Awesomeness

So today was the second get together of us YWiC alumni. I know Ari and I aren't technically alumni, but I like to think of us as such. I had so much fun today, I didn't want it to end. But alas, all good things must pass. 

So the day didn't start out all that well, as I woke up so tired. I did, however, get to sleep in. That's always a plus. I got ready, and I organized my music, so I was prepared. Nöel took us to school, and it was nice. Right away we got to work helping set up the orchestra room. We went through our concert music after the bell rang, and then spent the last few minutes practicing Sleigh Ride. We didn't get to play it last year because 1) we sucked at it and 2) the band was going to play it and they didn't want to share. Oh wait. We almost played it. We didn't have enough time, and all of us firsts were glad. It's super hard for first violins, as there is a lot of shifting into really high positions. 

After orchestra was APUS. I liked it, but some people didn't. We worked in groups, and I was so thankful because I didn't have to work with Lesli. It's been really weird and awkward with her. I honestly don't want to deal with her anymore, and I guess the universe decided I don't have to. So thank you for that. 

Lunch was spent in te MESA room doing test corrections which I had Katrina deliver to Mrs. Kleczka. Then ari and I went to Spanish. I started writing a really good story on the iPad's we were using. I always start a story on one when I use them in the hopes that someone will continue the story. I'm not sure I want someone else to finish what I started. Maybe I'll post what I wrote here. I don't know.....I guess if I get enough people asking for it, I'll post it here. Otherwise I'll just write it and then post a link to the finished story. But that most likely won't happen for a very long time. Oh well. 

I almost fell asleep in cs today. Please don't be mad. I was just so drained from my lack of sleep and all I was doing was running tests. It was SOOOO boring. I was glad to get away. 

Right after we got home, our mom took us to get the supplies needed for our monthly get together with awesome people. We didn't plan it all that well, as we didn't get home until about half an hour before the actual thing was supposed to start. Ari and I set to work getting the gifts done. This month was to celebrate birthdays, so we got champagne glasses that say Happy Birthday on them and filled them with candy. Noor, Tasha, and Jen all have birthdays in September and October in the case of Jen. So we got them candy that they like. Mom would let us go to the potluck without salad, so she made fruit salad while Ari made the regular salad. Then we were off. 

It was a little awkward for us when we first got there. Ari and I had to familiarize ourselfs with everyone there again, as it had been a few weeks since we last saw them. Soon, though, we slid back into ease and comfort with them. We ate and talked and had a good time. Once dinner was over, we decided to play a game called Reverse Charades. Sam had to leave, sadly, so we had two teams of four. The rules of the game are simple. One person holds the phone (the game is an app), and the rest of the team has to act out whatever is on the phone so the person can guess. It was so much fun. Our group was called ATAM since our group was Ari, Tasha, me (Ana), and Marie. We were pretty good. We won the first game, but Jen's team won the second round. Her team was comprised f her, Noor, Nicole, and Susi. It was so funny watching them. I almost owed myself from laughing so hard at their guesses and acting. Our team was ahead on the third round, but we had to leave. It was sad. We handed out the gifts and the extra candy for the closest birthdays, and they thanked us. They loved it. They were wondering how we stuffed so much candy in the little glasses with tissue paper. I felt proud. Noor gave us our gift, and I have her the little NMSU elephant keychain I found during the summer. We also got goody bags from Jen. It was so awesome. She walked us out, and it just felt nice. As soon as we got into the car, exhaustion sunk deep into my bones. I felt content, yet sad.  Not for what happened, but because it had to end. The YWiC gang is my family. They have been there the longest for me. Tasha has known us for five years. They have influenced us and taught us so much. I feel honored to be included in the monthly get togethers. I just feel so comfortable around them. It's weird. But I love it. I just feel so sad that we had to leave. Oh well. As Mica once quoted to me, "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened." I should listen to her and Dr. Suess. Ok. So long for now!

Life Goes On

Hi........So.......Ummm....

I'm really sorry for not posting. Life has been a little hectic, and I just didn't have the time to sit down and write about my life. But I will finish this and post it!

So...My life....Well, it's been pretty busy and exciting these past couple of weeks. School started, and I'm sad to say Ari and I only have our electives together. It kinda sucks, but at the same time doesn't, sine I've been gone a few times already and she gets my work for me. Anyways....

So Lilia is awesome. She finally joined orchestra!!!!! You have no idea how happy that makes me! She really should sit next to Noelia, but she sits in the back. I hope Mr. Rivera moves her soon, though. In other news, I have Lilia in my APUS class, and we sit next to each other. It's great. I also sit kinda behind Lizzy, and she always makes me massage her neck when I sit down. I know, I know...It's weird, but I do it anyway. I apparently give really good massages.

So we had this CS Community Night at Centennial, and I saw my Robin!! I've been missing all the YWiC people, but SP the most. She is so awesome. I also got her to sign my Batman bag! It was awesome. Sadly, Ms. H put us across the room from them and the Supercomputing table where Katrina and Lilia were, so I made my own little sign that said "Hi" on it and communicated with them through that. Sidenote: When we were talking about how far away our table was from kat's and Lilia's, Kat was like, "We'll communicate through smoke signals," or something like that. I jumped at the opportunity, and was like, "With what? Your joint?" We all started laughing. It's an inside joke that I might share with anyone who asks. But yeah. It was funny. Ok. I'm rambling. On with my life!

Now for the sucky parts of life. I guess the first thing was my relationship with Lesli. It's still awkward sometimes, but it's ok. Sometimes I don't know how to respond, but it's getting better. I always wonder why I am still willing to be her friend after all the shit she put me through. I saw this pic that said, "If former lovers can remain friends afterwards, it's because they are still in love, or they never were." I don't know if I was ever in love with her. I think that was the sucky thing about it being my first relationship; I didn't know anything. I will take it as a learning experience and move on. Ok. Pity party over.
Next thing kinda goes with the third thing, but only slightly. So on Friday, the Relay For Life event was held at Centennial, though there was almost no advertisement for it. I really wanted to go to honor my madrina who passed away last November. Only problem was that we had to go shopping for black dresses for a photo-shoot we had to go to. I won't say what it was for until the right time though, so yeah. We were at the mall for 3 hours before we went to Target and found the perfect black dresses for both of us. My God, did it take forever. I couldn't wait for it to be over. By that time< I was dead on my feet and feeling terrible. But still, we went to Relay for Life. We saw Kristen there, and walked a few laps with her. If you guys want to know what exactly Relay for Life is, click here, because I don't really want to explain it. So we stayed there for like an hour and a half before I got too exhausted to stay awake. I crashed as soon as I hit my bed. But we had to wake up early for the photo-shoot which was at 11. So I felt worn down. And I didn't really like the photographer all that much. But oh well.
Number three. I currently have a cold. Don't know what kind, but I feel like shit. I started feeling sick on Thursday, but had hoped it was just allergies. Nope. I'm sick. How do I know? Well, my temperature was 98.6 degrees Fahrenheit. I know that's normal for everyone else, but my normal temperature is 96.8 degrees. So my fever was 2 degrees. That's actually a lot. I know it doesn't sound like it. So I'm sorry to my friends if any of you catch my cold. Oh, and Ari has it too. So. Yeah. I hope you don't get sick from us. I guess that's all for right now. So long!

Long Lost Uncles, Juggling, and More!!

So today was the first real day of our vacation. It felt weird. We've been so busy with YWiC and out trip to LA, so we haven't really had time to relax.

So today was my first physical therapy session in almost a year. Last year, my right hip was giving me issues and made my scoliosis worse, but this year it's my left hip. So now I have to do new stretches and exercises for it. Ari had her evaluation after me, and it was hilarious. Her left arm is so much weaker than the other, so much so that she couldn't even resist against the physical therapist. She will have to go in to build up the muscle. Anywho. So for the past few days, we've been with family. It started on Friday because that's when all my uncles on my dad's side were all together. We have a "long lost uncle" names Ernie. He's called that because we haven't seen him in nine years. Since then, he's gotten sick and had an aneurism removed. It was scary. But he's better now, and I'm so glad we got to spend time with him. Our other uncle, Raul, is also kinda distant. Literally. Both Ernie and Raul live in Texas, along with my Tia Ramona. It's weird how little I get to see them, so I always make the most of their visits.
So on Friday, we went over to my uncle's house, the one that lives here, and we spent some time with them. It was cool, and I learned how to juggle!! It was cool. Noel taught us how to juggle bean bags while we were there, and was just a little upset at how easily Ari and I picked it up. We're not masters, far from it, but we could be if we spent enough time on it. Our brothers also taught us how to play pool. It was fun. By the end of the night, I was beating Ari.
So Sunday was Amiyah's party. Amiyah is my niece and daughter of my brother Rene. Her birthday was July 14th, but we decided to do the party this past Sunday because that's when all my uncles were together. We got up pretty late, but still managed to be at the park at 12. It was held early so that my brother could attend it. He had to leave Sunday evening, so there was no way it could be held later. That party lasted five hours. Impressive, huh? Mom says that they used to have parties like that all the time for us when we were younger, but stopped because those parties would last till 2 or 3 in the morning. Our family sure knows how to party.
It was a nice party, and we got to play softball with family. It's been almost 6 years since I've played at all, but it was nice to see that I wasn't terrible. I even hit a home run. But now I'm all sore. After the party, we saw our brother off, and wished him well.
Monday! It was hectic. After therapy, we went home and got ready for the family dinner held at my dad's parents' house. It was fun. The food was good. Raul and Ernie were really funny, and it saddened me to think that I've missed out. I just hope I can see more of them in the future.
I think that's all I have for now. Sorry it's a day late, but I hope you still enjoy it! So long for now!

Not My Best Post

Hi there. How's it going? I hope your day is going great. Ok, on to my day!
So I woke up after having this weird dream about a spider, and forced myself to get up. It was so hard. We got here a few minutes late, but it was ok. After getting all the certificates signed, we went into the auditorium. We waited and saw some videos. It was cool.
After that, we took our group to the CS workshop, and it was interesting to see how competitive they were. I worked quite a bit on my story. It's not on it's seventh chapter, and I'm excited to see where it's going. I know the basic plot line, but it just feels like it's dragging to me. Maybe someday I'll post a link to my story. If enough people ask for it. Anyways.
So lunch came on time, and it was delicious. I ate so much! I was stuffed. And the shirt I'm wearing definitely didn't help. It's tighter than most shirts I wear, and didn't allow for my stomach to expand. After lunch, we went to go get frozen yogurt. Susi and I saw Linday there. I miss her. She has known Ari and I since the sixth grade. My friends Kristen reminds me of her. Anywho
Instead of doing the outside activity, Ari and I stayed in to rearrange the room as well as do dishes. We didn't finish until around 2:15, and there was a TON of food. We didn't know what to do with it, so I asked SP, who asked Becca. Becca said to go around and ask if people wanted to eat the food, and then call my mom if there was a lot left over. I called my brother and we gave him two full plates of food. It was pretty amazing. Mom ended up getting some more rice and stuff when they came to pick it up. She was happy.
We missed most of the first workshop, but were good for the NXT one. Jen had us go get a few more bins for the girls who were doing the alligator. It was cool. I tried working on my story some more, but I have no idea to get it to go where I want it to go. Oh well.


I guess now I should do the prompt. If I could create a holiday, I would definitely create a National Twin Day. I know there is a Twin Festival in Ohio, but this would allow for everyone to celebrate their Twin-ness. Being a twin is very integral to my being. Life would be so much harder for me if I hadn't been born a twin. This day would allow me to fully embrace being a twin. It's still a little uncomfortable for me to be physically affectionate with Ari. If Twin Day had existed in my elementary days, I may have never let that stupid comment get to me. Anyways.
Twins are not that rare anymore, but just enough for them to warrant some special attention. I know everyone want to know about twins, based on the questions I get all the time. I think it would give twins a reason to stay close. Some aren't, and that saddens me. Twins need to stick together. We were born together, for Pete's sake.(Sidenote: Did you know that the saying, "For Pete's sake" came from a letter Michelangelo wrote to whoever was funding the St. Peter's Basilica, asking for more money? He signed it, "For St. Peter's sake." Sorry. Just thought it was interesting.)
I guess that's all for now. So long!!